9 Things Not to Do as a Writer

As some of you know, Writer Abroad runs a writing workshop in Zurich. Every year, writers submit work for critique by our authors in residence, and every year, Writer Abroad is once again amazed by the number of writers who do not follow the submission instructions—even those who register for advanced workshops.

Forget great writing—yes, you must have that too—but as a writer, it’s easy to stand out from the crowd just by following submission instructions.

Over the last four years, here are some of the main problems Writer Abroad has observed while collecting submissions:

1. Writers don’t meet deadlines and think they should have an exception.

2. Writers submit up to 10 (!) more pages than is allowed.

3. Writers use single spacing instead of the requested double spacing.

4. Writers mess with margin sizes to cram as much text as possible on a page.

5. Writers don’t put their names on their files.

6. Writers don’t send documents in correct formats (when a .doc is requested, don’t send a .docx or a .pdf).

7. Writers use strange fonts (you should have a good reason to use anything other than Times New Roman).

8. Writers annoy gatekeepers by going around them.

9. Writers send several emails with different submissions, each time saying, “I changed my mind, use this one instead.”

Moral of the story? If you’re submitting something, make sure to check the guidelines. Then double-check them. Then triple-check them. Make sure what you’re sending is what you want to send even though this sounds obvious. Do all of this before you click send. It’s only professional. Editors, judges, and workshop coordinators everywhere will have a good impression of you from the start. Isn’t that what all writers want?

If you're an editor, writing judge, or other submission collector, what mistakes do you see writers making?

5 Jobs that will make you a better writer

Most writers know this sad truth: it’s hard to make a living. Many of us work other jobs to support our writing, at least when we are starting out. But which jobs are best for writers? Writer Abroad has complied a short list of jobs that may improve your writing, along with successful authors who have done them.

ESL Teacher

How better to understand the English language than to try to explain it to others? Teach English to non-native speakers and you’ll also discover a new world of characters and cultural understanding.

Successful author example: Peter Hessler

Hairdresser

No one hears more of life’s little stories than a hairdresser. Become a one and you’ll probably also become a better storyteller.

Successful author example: Deborah Rodriguez

Expat at Large

Take any job or maybe no job at all, but do it in an entirely different country. Your old world will become clearer to describe and you’ll have a brand new one open to you as well.

Successful author: Janet Skeslien Charles

Copywriter

Take a complicated business problem and solve it with a one liner that entertains. Oh, and do it in an hour, please. Become a copywriter and you’ll write succinctly and be able to handle deadline pressure.

Successful author example: Augusten Burroughs

Bookseller

No writer knows what other writers are publishing these days more than a bookseller. Become one and you’ll know the trends and markets that are important for writers today.

Successful author example: Diccon Bewes

What are some other good jobs for writers? Why?

What children’s books teach us about writing

Writer Abroad was up at 4 a.m. this morning reading Goodnight, Moon, Mr. Brown Can Moo! Can You?, and Corduroy to Baby M. Some of these books were read at least five times in a row. (Note: Writer Abroad usually reads on demand.) 

Children's books can teach us a lot about good writing

Most writers don't study books for very young children in order to improve their writing. But, as Writer Abroad discovered, studying the short story (the 200-word version) is possibly the best way to learn about good writing.

Writing should have rhythm.

Great example: ABC by Dr. Seuss

The story should have a forward momentum.

(The words should beg you to finish them, even after the tenth reading in a row...)

Great example: Barnyard Dance by Sandra Boynton

There should be a lesson.

Great example: Little Pea by Amy Krouse Rosenthal

Parallel construction is nice. Especially when it's done with humor too.

Great example: But Not the Hippopotamus by Sandra Boynton

Ok fellow writers, Writer Abroad needs a nap! Anyone else have examples of what a great children's book can teach us?

The Train from Paris to Zurich

Take the train to take your writing further

There’s something about the TGV. Every time Writer Abroad rides it from Paris to Zurich her novel goes somewhere too. It was two years ago when the train inspired the idea for her novel and two weeks ago when the same train ride helped her solve a plot issue that had been bothering her.

This makes Writer Abroad wish she had the time to do her writing on the train every week. But unfortunately, this isn’t too practical. Because besides bringing her laptop, Writer Abroad would normally also have to also bring her 11-month-old baby. Nope, right now when it comes to writing, it's nap time or never.

Where would you write if you could write anywhere? 

Writing Character Sketches the Modern Way

I’ve discovered a new way to really get to know a character: write their Facebook profile.

Start with the basics: their job, where they went to school, what languages they speak, where they’re from and when they were born.

Then you can move on to their philosophy, the books and movies they like, their political views and their activities and interests.

Also revealing can be the photos they might post of themselves. And who are their friends? And who are the friends that are pending that your character might reject?

Are there events coming up in their life? What websites does your character link to? And how would they describe themselves in an “about me” summary?

Probably the most fun is their wall. What do they write in their status updates? Do they write their entire life story? Do they just post links to interesting stories? Write a page of status updates and find out.

Answer these questions and more and if your experience is anything like mine, you’ll be well on your way to creating an in-depth character. Now that's a definite Like.

Do you have an interesting method for writing character sketches?

Getting some perspective

I like writing in the present tense. It gives a story a cinematic feel and it also helps me capture a moment in a way that shows, rather than tells. So I wrote most of my 87,000-word memoir in present tense. It worked, it flowed, but something was missing and I didn’t know what.

Thanks to some feedback at the Zurich Writers Workshop a couple of weeks ago, I now know exactly what was missing: the memoir needs more perspective. To achieve this, I am now going back and rewriting the chapters in the past tense in order to create more narrative distance and add a bit more reflection and cultural insight to the work.

It’s amazing that this little nugget of advice can make such a difference.

Any bits of advice you’ve learned at a class or workshop that you found immediately helpful?

On not writing

My parents were visiting over the last two weeks, so instead of stressing over trying to balance my work with my visitors, I spent almost that entire time without writing anything. Since I'm a workaholic, I was kind of nervous about not writing, but it turned out to be easy. No book editing, no copywriting, no blogging, no emails, no essay writing, no queries, no nothing.

Out of not writing, came two ideas for my writing: one for a book and one for an essay.

I guess you could say that not writing is productive too. Maybe I should relax more often.

How do you schedule time away from writing? And if you have visitors that come for long periods of time, do they respect your work even if you work from home?

3 Things the Alps Can Teach Us About Writing

This morning I woke up in my Alpine apartment and could hardly walk. After two days of solid hiking in the Alps, I was desperate to do at least one more hike. I went to the grocery store and bought a band-aid for my blister. But halfway to the lift station, I had to turn around. My foot hurt too much. The day before I had hiked over 7 hours. The day before that, over 4.

Which brings me to my writing. In hiking as in writing, I often push myself to the extremes. I need to work on pacing myself. So this week, no writing. And less hiking now too...

Here are a few things I've learned so far in the Alps.

1. Be patient. The fog will lift. You just have to wait. Maybe an hour. Maybe two days. The same goes for writer's block. Don't have a solution to a problem? Take a break. Wait it out. The answer will come. The fog will clear.

2. Pace yourself. A seven-hour hike one day may mean you can barely walk the next. Writing too much can be hazardous too. Last fall, I couldn't type for a week after working too much at my computer.

3. One step at a time. Yesterday I hiked to the bottom of the Aletsch Glacier. But then I had to hike back up. Over 300 meters up. It looked daunting. Until I stopped looking up and started looking across. Yes, with writing too, it's good to have a final goal. But if you don't take the steps in between, you'll never make it. You'll only dream it. That's why when I'm working on a book, I only write 1,000 words a day. One word at a time.

What has a summer vacation taught you about writing?

Don't Wait for Success

One of the most valuable things I learned last week at the Paris Writers' Workshop (aside from tips on how to score an apartment rental in Paris for 200 Euros a week) is to not wait for success.

I have finished a memoir and am ready to look for an agent. But my instructor advised me to start on my next project in the meantime. This advice was also echoed by a group of first-time novelists. Most said it took them up to a year and querying 100 agents to find the one to represent their project. Working on another project in the meantime supposedly keeps you sane. The advice to start on my next project was also spoken indirectly by an agent I met, who wasn't interested in memoir at the moment, but asked me if I had a novel.

Sadly, I don't have a novel right now. But give me a year and maybe I will. Thanks to the workshop, I'm inspired to start my next project while trying to sell my current one.

What valuable piece of writing advice have you received?

Math vs Memoir

Summer has finally come to Switzerland. So why do I wish I were working on a math problem instead of a memoir?

Because once I found the solution to the math problem I would be done. Finished.

How boring.

How wonderful.

Instead, I’ve got to decide for myself when each piece and part of my book is done.

This is hard. I'm used to hard. I live in a country where people speak in one language and write in another. But still.

When you're writing something, how do you decide when it's finished?

5 Fun Ways to Improve Your Writing

Writers should have more fun. We're so serious all the time, sending queries, reading literary masterpieces, analyzing misplaced modifiers, it's enough to make anyone we live with go crazy (sorry, Husband!)–not to mention ourselves.

My best writing happens when I stop working and start playing. Here are a few ways I've had fun with writing that I recommend.

One. Take singing lessons. People used to ask me, “what are you going to do, sing your jingles?” It was a fair question since I was a double major in both music and advertising at the University of Illinois. But now I know this: learning to sing is great training for being a writer. You learn to listen to words. You sing poetry. And you learn to explore the rhythm of many languages, including English. And yes, sometimes you even end up singing jingles. In German.

Two. Take a copywriting class. Attending a school like the VCU Brandcenter as a copywriter is a great alternative to an MFA. You’ll learn how to create more ideas than you ever thought possible, how to come back with 50 more after they’re ripped apart in your face, and how to say the most in the least amount of words. And at the end of the program, you’ll even be employable.

Three. Live abroad. According to a professor at INSEAD, living abroad makes us more creative. You’ll solve problems in new ways, fill in the blanks of conversations, and see yourself and your home country with a new perspective. If you want to combine living abroad with learning copywriting, check out the Miami Ad School. They have locations all over the world.

Four. Read. Nothing said more fun to me as a child than those crinkly tissue paper book order forms. And bonus! Reading really is one of the best ways to improve your writing. And don’t just stick to one kind of book—read them all—travel guidebooks, literary magazines, trashy magazines, novels, tax forms, memoirs—you never know what’s going to inspire or what you’ll want to make fun of in an essay later.

Five. Practice. Like learning an instrument, like playing a sport, you don’t get better at writing without practicing. But practicing doesn't have to suck. If it does, you're practicing the wrong way. Find what is fun: keep a blog, keep a journal, volunteer to write for the local newspaper, write postcards, it's all writing. And do it every day—even when it doesn’t seem to matter, even when every editor seems to be ignoring you, even when you feel like giving up. Don’t. Just figure out a way to play instead of work.

How do you make writing fun?

What Swiss Transportation Can Teach Us About Writing

(photo by Brian Opyd)

The Swiss transportation system is notorious for its timeliness and efficiency. So what can writers learn from it?

Punctuality is important. If you aren’t on time, you’ll be left behind. Meeting deadlines, whether they are self-imposed or from an assignment, is important and will help separate you from the millions of other wannabe writers.

Have a plan. The Swiss do. That’s how they wake up in the city and are at the top of a snowy mountain in time for lunch: The tram connects to the train that connects to the bus that connects to the cable car that gets them to that mountain restaurant at the top of the Alps. But if you don’t know each step that will take you there, how will you get to lunch? This same concept applies to writing. I have learned that a big goal—in this case, writing a memoir—must be broken down into easy digestible steps—and you must know what they are.

Slow and steady (usually) wins the race. The Swiss don’t have high-speed trains. But their punctuality, efficient timetables, and dependable schedules mean that about 99% of the time, you always reach your destination as planned. Rushing through things is usually not the answer—especially when it comes to writing.

Go outside your comfort zone. Swiss trains don’t just end in Switzerland. I can use my Swiss pass in Lichtenstein (ooh Lichtenstein!), to border towns in Germany (yes! cheaper groceries!), and to get half-price tickets in Austria. Reaching further than you think you can go with your writing is important too.

Trust is paramount. You can ride a tram in Zurich for over two years before someone official will actually check to make sure you bought a ticket. The level of trust in Switzerland is high, and likewise, as a writer, you could use a little of this trust. Trust that you can reach your goals. Trust that you are good enough. Trust that what you are writing is important.

What has something unexpected taught you about writing?